Pasted Smiles

Tears fall as

Thoughts bombard my head with messages it never asked to be sent

Perfectly happy moments destroyed by terrorists disguised as thoughts

Thoughts pleading with me to please the world by leaving it

Thoughts begging for humanity’s salvation, through accepting my own damnation

I dont know how to stop these thoughts

Though if I think about it

It doesn’t really help just gives a doorway

So I color instead and then the thoughts seem more true

When they tell me how little I bring to the table that is life

And I dont know how to make them stop

And i wish

I wish they would stop

There are bombs going off in my head

And all they can say is smile

Fake it til you make it

Well I’ve made it, made it to bombs blazing

Smiles fading.

It’s only the smile fading they seem to have a problem with

The only thing they want a solution for

I want a solution but unfortunately Im not a math equation

2+2 doesn’t equal me

So I have to keep coloring and try and quiet crying

And paste a smile on my face

So I can avoid questions about bombings and bruises

And how I’m really doing.




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